Social Skills: How to Behave Yourself

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Be Nice to People

Haven't you always wanted to be nice to people? To have them be nice back? Being nice is not difficult, but it needs some polishing for others to realize your effort. A Smile on your face makes others smile too. A kind word to someone, or holding a door open to the person who is about to enter, is really easy to do, and in the long run will make you happy!

Steps

Smile to everyone you meet. It will urge the other person to smile back. A smile a day is the essential movement to niceness, and even if the person you met is your worst enemy, muster a little smile and say a friendly "Hi!" to her. But don't do this in the morning if someone looks like they're half asleep, just smile and nod to them if they don't offer a response of their own.
Greet everybody you know, not only with that smile, but also a 'hello'. If you have the time, try to introduce yourself to everybody you meet and don't know yet. Chances are that one of the hundreds you get to know will become your best friend!
Start a conversation. Talk about small stuff that you know the person would be interested in. If you don't know the other person well enough to know about their preferences, try to talk about things happening around you. (The meeting you've both been to an hour ago, the new guy in Math class, the fantastic new shoes your colleague has been wearing, etc.)
Try to compliment your new pal. But be careful, though, not to flatter them too much. Too much flattery can give the impression that you are sucking up to them, and especially if this new friend is a superior, they will think of you as a lapdog or butt-kisser.
Make arrangements to meet or talk almost every week. Remember to exchange contact methods. Get her email, grab his address, ask for their phone number. Don't leave without getting their personal info if you really like him/her! (However, if they balk at supplying contact information, do not harass them trying to get it. Be nice, smile, and offer to run into them again some day.)
Get them something nice once in a while. And for holidays or birthdays, buy something really special that you know s/he will really appreciate. It doesn't need to be something super expensive. A box of chocolates, a new notebook, if you really mean it, your friend will get the message and be nicer to you too.
Be polite to others. Help when needed, even to people you have never met before. That person might be lonely, and you may be the only one they have talked to that day. Imagine how happy they will be...and you will be happy also, knowing you have been nice to someone.
Don't cuss. It projects an ugly image of you.
Be nice to everyone, even those who have been nasty to you. Who knows? They might start being nice to you, too! And if they don't, at least you are being decent.
Be eager to offer help. Especially to those who have their arms full, children they are attending to, difficulty walking, carrying heavy articles, etc. One day, you might be like them, and they will offer their help to you. Lending others a helping hand is also a good feeling.
Offer to help clean up after a party or a get-together. The host might be tired, and welcome your help.
Always remember to treat people the way you would like to be treated. If you are nice to people they will treat you in the right manner, and if you are horrible and nasty to people they will think that you're mean and ignore you.
If people are nasty to you, always treat them nicely even though you don't want to. It will come in use one day.
If you have people who are very ill-mannered to you, never act the same way back, because you are bringing yourself down to their level

.Tips

Be nice to others, and they will be nice to you!
Not only will they be nice to you, be nicer than ever and you might even get a friend for life!
Remember that certain things that are considered nice in some cultures may in fact be rude in others. Be sure to do some anthropological research before going to different countries so that you may politely enjoy the local customs.
Remember that no-one is exempt from any practices of kindness.
Look people in the eyes when you talk to them.
Be nice in front of people even if you need to say mean things to yourself later.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Be Nice

You've been told to be nice since you were a child. But what exactly does that mean for an adult? "Nice" is a vague term to put it. If your parents never gave a definition. Were your parents nice to you? Being nice to people, especially your friends, can pay off big time.

Steps

1

Smile.

Smile. A smile will let people know that you are pleasant. If you smile at someone, look them in the eye. For the most part, if you smile at someone, they won't do anything but smile back. If they don't, then maybe they are just having a bad day. It is up to you to set the mood of the encounter. Make it happy by being the first to smile. Normally, making faces or moody looks at someone is not nice.
2

Say hola.

Say hola. When you're walking past someone, even a stranger, try to acknowledge their presence with simple "hello" or "hi" or even just a wave or a nod in their direction. Adding the smile to this can make it all the more friendly. Other parents always like kids that say hello and how are you, and so do friends.
3

Ask people how they are doing.

Ask people how they are doing. Take the time to ask someone how things are going in their lives, without being nosy or intrusive. If they seem resistant to talking, just let them know that you're always around to talk to, and that you want them to be all right. They will understand that you're trying to care for them and not assume that you are a prying person, which you are not.
4

Be a good listener.

Be a good listener. Listen when other people are talking to you. It isn't nice to just ignore other people's opinions and stories. If you find that someone is becoming rude or pushy, acknowledge their opinion, issue a compliment ("Having your own set of values and beliefs is pretty admirable") and excuse yourself politely ("I'm sorry, I've got to go get the groceries so I can meet my husband/wife when they get home.").
5

Be courteous.

Be courteous. Always say "please," "thank you" and "you're welcome." You can also address people by sir or ma'am, depending on the occasion. Be patient, observant, and considerate. Treat people with respect. Even if you don't particularly like someone at first, they could end up being a really interesting and kind person. Don't forget "Excuse me" instead of "MOVE!". Remember: People aren't dogs or the ground you spit on, they are living beings like you. If you are respectful to that person, that person will have to act the same way. Why would they be mean to you when you're being a good person?
6

Be positive.

Be positive. Don't be negative or critical. Keep looking for the positive in any given situation. Cheer them up. There are two sides to things: the positive side and the negative side. Mention the positive side of the thing first before mentioning the negative side in a nice way. E.g. "That dress is stunningly elegant (positivity), but I would love it better if it didn't have so many sequins on it(negativity in a nice way)."
7

Be humble.

Be humble. The key to being nice is remembering that you are not "better" than someone else. You're an individual, but everybody has their struggles, and being nice to one another makes life better for everyone. Don't brag or have a high ego. Everybody is equal. But still be positive and bright.
8

Offer to help.

Offer to help. If you see someone struggling or doing anything, offer to help, even doing something as simple as carrying a bag of groceries, or hold the door for someone. You can also be nice to the community and the world by volunteering.
9

Be sincere.

Be sincere. Don't be nice as a means to an end. If you just want to be nice so that you can gain preferential treatment, it's quite the opposite of being nice-it's deceptive, shallow and cruel. Be nice because you want to look back on your life and know that you were a nice person, no matter what. Be nice because you feel like you willingly want to.
10

Don't talk about other people and don't be a backstabber.

Don't talk about other people and don't be a backstabber. Try to be nice to everyone and don't pick favorites. Also, don't be two-faced or talk about people who trust you. Don't ever gossip about other people you don't like. Just think about all the positive things about them and the negative opinions about them will slowly fade, leaving you no excuses to gossip.
11

Always try to make friends that are nice.

Always try to make friends that are nice. If you make friends who are rude, that would make you look rude because you associate yourself with rudeness. If you have friends that are like you, your life will be much better. However, you can try being nice to a rude friend. Maybe that friend will start being nice too.
12

Do those little things.

Do those little things. Those little, everyday things, like holding the door for a teacher you don't know, or smiling at someone who isn't always nice to you- those little tiny things that don't seem to matter much, but in the end, you come off as a much nicer person and you also show that you sincerely and genuinely care.
13

Make sure to be as nice as they are to you.

Make sure to be as nice as they are to you. If your friends give you a present say something honestly positive about it even if you don't like it and make sure you don't tell anyone that you don't like it. It will end in a fall out, and make sure that if you haven't got them a present don't tell them in a horrible voice I wouldn't mention it at all!
14

Be Mature.

Be Mature. If someone is being mean to you still be nice to them. Don't bring yourself down to their level by being mean back at them. They might get your drift and stop being mean to you.
15

Don't hurt them.

Don't hurt them. If you and your brother are fighting don't beat him up to the point where he is crying. Be nice to him and let him have his way.
16

Try to compliment people.

Try to compliment people. Do not compliment on a daily basis to the same people or else they will think you are trying to "butter them up" before asking for a favor. Only compliment if you truly mean it
Tips

Always remember the Golden Rule: Treat others the way you want to be treated.And respect them for who they are. don't change them. Even though some people may not be nice to you at first, they will come around eventually.
If you're still attending school you must make sure to steer clear of drama and gossip. If someone decides to randomly gossip to you,"Hey did you hear what Sue said about Mary?", simply walk away. Its really that easy.
If you get annoyed by someone try to remember they're probably unaware that they are being annoying. Keep positive.
Assume the best about people. Most people don't mean to insult or offend others most of the time. Unless it's overt, assume the slight was accidental.
Bad language, gossiping, whining, selfishness and greediness don't mix with being nice.
Hold the door open for someone who is approaching the door the same time you are. Allow them to go in ahead of you. Do the same if you are leaving a store, hold the door open wide, and allow whoever is leaving to leave before you.
If you are sitting, and you see an older, pregnant, ill person, or someone with a baby or small children standing, offer them your seat if there are no other free seats close by.
Remember using vulgar language won't make a very good impression
If you say the words "no offense" before pointing out something to someone it's most likely rude or offensive.
If you're a guy it may be a bit awkward to smile, especially at other male strangers. If that is the case, then simply ofter a casual "alright?", "hi" or "how's it going?". It works just as well as a smile, and can be more comfortable.
If you find yourself thinking poorly about someone, don't worry; you're not a terrible person because we all do this from time to time. However, try to catch yourself doing it, and think of something nice about that person instead. It'll help you look at people more positively, and you'll quickly break the habit of seeing the worst in someone.
Don't laugh at other peoples' mistakes and don't point out their faults too harshly. It's okay to joke, of course, but use your common sense; think about what you're about to say, and consider the fact that just because you may not be offended by a certain comment, others could be.
Be optimistic about everything, even when you don't particularly feel like it. Always look on the bright side!
Never underestimate the power of optimism, but at the same time, you can *************** a joke in a funny way to make you more likable (ex: that class was so boring) or just something unexpected so long as you counteract it with a lot of positive behavior as well. Funny, I find, is nice.
If you are really struggling with being nice to someone you really don't like, go imagine that person truly hurt or crying. If you think 'serves them right,' you need to think deeper. If you would try to comfort them or save them, that usually changes hate to care.
If someone/a friend around you is being mean, rude, or using bad language, try to break them of the habit.
If someone that you have been mean to in the past isn't acting nice when you do, then they are still holding on to the past, try to apologize and fix whatever you have done.
Stick up for people who are subject to teasing (eg. people with mental disablities). Even if someone just makes a slight comment, point out that they can't help being different and shouldn't be made fun of. If you do this in a tactful way, people will see you as being nice to people less fortunate, and therefore see you as an all round nice person.

Warnings

While being nice, do not be a total pushover. Compromise is good, but expect to be treated fairly. Don't be afraid to stand up for what is right and do not hesitate to defend someone. If you find that you're being considerate of someone's time but they are not being considerate of yours, bow out as respectfully as you can and make yourself scarce.
Learn how to gently and subtly let someone know that you're just being nice, which by the way is not the easiest thing to do, but it will prevent a lot of miscommunication. Do not go over the top with being nice because people will think that you are only doing it for yourself.
You may have heard that "It doesn't matter what someone looks like, but it's what's on the inside that counts". This is partially true, but you only have one chance at meeting someone. If you are barbarous the first time, that is how you'll be known. If you are friendly the first impression, people will know you as nice and sincere.
Remember to stand up for others, and do not gossip about them.
Also be careful smiling or saying Hi to someone who you have a bad background with... it can backfire and they may think your being sly and they may reply with a not very nice comment.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Be Nice to a Girl

Girls like it when gentlemen are nice to them. So be nice!

Steps

Care. Care for her. If you are in middle school carry her binder and do things such as opening the door for her, giving a bouquet of flowers on special events like her birthday etc. Some girls however will not like it if you overdo the niceness. Don't go overkill.
Listen. Listen to what she is saying. Do not stop her while she is speaking, just listen to her.
Be kind, and not just to the girl you are trying to impress. A better suggestion would simply be to be a nice person. Remember, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Open a car door for her. She will appreciate it. Comfort her. If she gets cold take your jacket and wrap it around her. Offer to carry her bag (if she's carrying one). Small acts of kindness make a big impression.
Be sincere. Mean what you say. Also be very courteous. It will give her ideas about being with you. Say things you actually MEAN about her. Example: "You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen". If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. Remember, honesty really is the best policy.
Listen to her problems and make her feel comfortable. If she has a problem ask her if there is any way you can fix it. Then simply listen or convince her you are listening. For women most of the time it isn't about fixing their problems, they usually will actually be annoyed if you try to fix it. They want you to just acknowledge their problem, and show that you care about how it makes them feel. Once again it can not be stressed enough that you must genuinely care, wholeheartedly. This also applies to listening. Both of these are key!
Hold her hand. It will make her feel secure and cared about. This can be awkward the first time, so just be confident and go for it. Hug her; it will make her feel safe and cared about. It's all about security. This can not be faked. You must genuinely care.
Express an interest in meeting her friends. Girls often call their friends boyfriends/girlfriends. They are close and without their friends approval you don't have hers. Try using some of these steps on them as well but not as much or you may seem to be a flirt.
Don't brag. Girls hate braggers. It makes you look like you only care about yourself and not about her. Also you may get carried away with bragging that you may forget that you are trying to impress a girl.
Give her compliments. Don't overdo it.
Walk her home . Girls love that . But if she doesn't want to , don't insist on it

Tips

This will only work if you care about her. Not all girls are self centered and this does not depend on them being so but you can not be self centered. You must care about the girl, genuinely.
Say stuff to her that will make the girl happy, but only say it if you mean it. If she's madly in love with you and she asks you to say "I love you", say "I want to really mean it when I say it".
Also, if she just wants to be friends, it's OK. Feel secure that you're still friends and one day it may turn into a relationship

Warnings

Do not be nervous! Do not barf! Girls do not want her boy or girl looking like a primitive animal. She will automatically ignore you and pay attention to other boys or girls.
Some girls might think you are too close to her when you wrap your jacket around her. If she does react that way, she probably didn't like you very much anyway.
Not all girls like the same thing! Be careful and watch her reactions. However, it is best to sit back and watch how she reacts to other guys before you have a go at her. This way, you can learn more about her without the risk of making her hate you.
This guide is less for those who are trying to be friendly and more for those who wish to express romantic interest.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Be Charming

Charm is the art of having an attractive personality. This characteristic can only be achieved over a period of time. While everyone is born with differing amounts of natural charm, much can be acquired and honed through practice and patience. As with dancing, the more you practice, the better you will become.

Steps

Improve your posture. Throw those shoulders back and let them drop (relax). When you walk, imagine you're crossing a finish line; the first part of your body to cross should be your torso, not your head. If you have poor posture, your head will be pushed forward, which makes you seem timid and insecure.
2

Smile With the Eyes.

Smile With the Eyes. Scientists have pinpointed more than 50 types of smiles, and research suggests that the sincerest smile of all is the Duchenne smile--a smile that pushes up into the eyes.[1] The reason it's more genuine is because the muscles needed to smile with our eyes are involuntary; they only become engaged in an authentic smile, not in a "courtesy" smile.[2] Also, research shows that if you look at someone and then smile, it instantly charms them.
Remember people's names when you meet them for the first time. This takes an enormous amount of effort for most people. Repeat the person's name when stating your name to that person will help you to remember it better. For example: "Hi Jack, I'm Wendy." Follow through with small talk and repeat the person's name. Repeat it once more when you say goodbye. It's not just about helping you to remember that person. The more you say a person's name, the more that person will feel that you like them and the greater the chance they'll warm up to you.
Be genuinely interested in people. You don't have to love everyone, but you should be curious or fascinated by people in some way. If you're empathic, maybe you're interested in how people feel. Or, you could be interested in how people work (psychology) or what people know (if you're an avid learner). Learn how to ask questions based on your interests whilst being polite (i.e. without prying) and you'll make people feel interesting.
Take into account topics that interest those around you, even if you are not so keen on them. If you are in a sporty crowd, talk about last night's game or the meteoric rise of a new team. If you are amongst a group of hobbyists, draw out their hobbies and make remarks related to fishing, knitting, mountain climbing, movies, etc. Nobody expects you to be an expert. Sometimes you can build rapport just by asking questions, and not caring if you seem naive. There are people who like talking about and explaining their interests, and will like you for listening. It is your level of interest and willingness to engage in topics that makes you an interesting person to be around. Exercise an open mind. Let others do the explaining. If someone mistakenly thinks you know more about the topic, be genuine and simply say that your knowledge is limited but that you are hoping to learn more about it.
Praise others instead of gossiping. If you are talking with someone or you are talking in a group of people, and up pops the subject of another person in a positive or negative way, be the one to mention something you like about that person. Hearsay is the most powerful tool in gaining charm because it is always viewed as 100% sincere. It has the added benefit of creating trust in you. The idea will spread that you never have a bad word to say about anyone. Everyone will know that their reputation is safe with you.
Issue compliments generously, especially to raise others' self esteem. Try to pick out something that you appreciate in any situation and verbally express that appreciation. If you like something or someone, find a creative way to say it and say it immediately. If you wait too long, it may be viewed as insincere and badly timed, especially if others have beaten you to it. Because you waited, you are most likely not confident in saying what you thought, so waiting will only result in a less than enthusiastic presentation. If you notice that someone is putting a lot of effort into something, compliment it, even if you feel that there is room for improvement. If you notice that someone has changed something about themselves (haircut, manner of dress, etc...) notice it, and point out something you like about it. If you are asked directly, be charming and deflect the question with a very general compliment.
Be gracious in accepting compliments. Get out of the habit of assuming that the compliment is being given without genuine intent. Even when someone makes a compliment out of contempt, there is always a germ of jealous truth hiding in their own heart. Be effusive in accepting the compliment. Go beyond a mere "thank you" and enjoin this with "I'm glad you like it" or "It is so kind of you to have noticed." These are "compliments in return." Avoid backhanding a compliment. There is nothing worse to a person complimenting than to receive the response "Oh well I wish I was as ______ as you/that situation." That is tantamount to saying, "No, I am not what you are saying I am, and your judgment is wrong."
Control your tone of voice. The tone of your voice is crucial. Voice should be gentle and peaceful. Articulate and speak clearly and project your voice. When you say, "you look nice today" it should be in the exact same tone that you would use to say "it's a nice day." Any variation from your normal tone will arouse suspicion about your sincerity. Practice giving compliments into a recorder and play it back. Does it sound sincere? Practice until you get it right.
Sometimes being charming is to simply be a good listener. Charm isn't always an outward expression, but an inward one too. Engage the other person to talk more about his or herself. About something that they like, something they're passionate about, about themselves. This makes him or her more comfortable to share and express themselves with you.
Assume rapport. This simply means talking to a stranger or a newly met acquaintance in a very friendly manner, like as if the person is a long lost friend or relative. This helps breaks down the awkwardness and speeds up the 'warm-up' process when meeting new people, making the person feel more welcomed and comfortable around you.
Kindness coupled with respect makes others feel as if they are loved and cared for. This is a powerful tool during interaction.
Watch the way you phrase things. Be mature and have a touch of wise, polite language. Don't you find people that say "Hello" are much more charming than people that mutter "'Sup"? Here is another example: Change "It's none of his beeswax!" to "It shouldn't be any of his concern." Of course, don't overdo it, but be polite and flip every negative aspect into a positive. It will really give you charm.

Tips

The degree of charm that you possess depends on the creativity of your praise. Say something that is not immediately obvious and say it in a poetic way. It's good to have some premeditated compliments and phrases but the most charming people are able to invent them on the spot. This way, you can be sure that you are not repeating it. If you can't think of anything to say bring up a current event that is interesting.
Empathy is at the core of charm. If you can't tell what makes people happy or unhappy, you have no way to assess whether you are saying the right or wrong thing.
Also, when you always greet someone, make them feel like they are the most important person to you. They will respond more nicely and always know what a great person you are.
Try standing to the right of a person when you talk to the others

Warnings

Every so often you will have no choice but to express an opinion that few others hold. That is fine. Consider expressing it in a humorous way. Humor is the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down.
Be patient. Something may be obvious to you but not so simple to others. Understand that and help them out.
Don't confuse being charming with being a people pleaser.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Create a Friendship in 60 Seconds

Meeting people sometimes can be difficult, but think about it: you may be missing a chance to talk to someone who could become your best friend!

Steps

Be confident. If the other person doesn't start the conversation, then you should try to start it. Look around and see what is the most interesting thing to talk about. Talking about fashion or music could help. You could start the conversation like this: "Have you seen (your favorite singer's) new video..." or "That is a really nice bracelet, where did you get it..." or something else in that style.
Remember that people judge you on first impressions. So always shower, brush your teeth and keep good hygiene, and dress nice. You shouldn't be too fancy. You just have to look decent and that will make people like you more. Also it is important to know that looks aren't everything, so follow all of these techniques as well.
Be interesting. Even if friendship is not based on clothing style, a fashionable combination could be a fun thing to talk about. Maybe you will find a friend with a similar clothing style.
DO NOT pick and choose. If you want friends you must be willing to associate with people who may not have an aura of confidence and popularity around them. If you pick ugly/unsociable/eclectic friends, they will be more faithful than someone who has people falling over themselves to impress them. Sometimes people will size you up well based on inclusiveness, and if they do not... what do you think they will do to you the next time a 'cooler-looking' person chats them up? Have common decency. Befriend the creepers. It will benefit you in the end. However, don't away from a "normal" or popular person just because of that.It is better to make a friendly acquaintance and cut it off later if this person proves to be treacherous or unfriendly rather than pass up a great friendship because of labels.
Big smile. The big smile is a sign that you are a fun person, and that makes it easy for the others, and they will come to you faster.
Think positively. The smile is important, but you have to smile on the inside too. Think about positive things, and your mood will make everyone feel good.
Keep in touch. You've just met someone and now you think that you can become good friends, so what are you waiting for? Ask for their phone number or their e-mail address and make sure you call.
Be open. Never judge anyone before you meet him/her, and be open for hanging out. You will be surprised by the number of new friendships coming your way, so always be equally nice and friendly to everyone and your life will be overflowing with friends.
Have fun. When you feel nervous, try to laugh more. That will help you to forget about the problem. You can say a joke - even a bad joke can put a smile on your face.
Don't be scared to randomly talk to someone, especially if you know absolutely no one at the place you are. Chances are, they want a new friend too, if they don't know anyone else either.
Take initiatives. Do not wait for people to come to you; approach them tactfully. For example, if you see someone eating at cafeteria alone, walk up to him/her and say something like "I've seen you in my biology class (or somewhere else or other occasions), can I join you?" If you are tired of being friendless, you MUST take action to change that or you will continue to feel miserable and being left out. Remember, no one can do this for you, only you can do this for yourself.
Do not get discouraged if your attempt to strike up a conversation goes nowhere. Understand that not everyone is sociable; practice your social skill on someone else.
Don't wait for opportunities because they may never come. Instead, think hard to create opportunities to initiate the contact. For example, if someone needs a ride to shop at Wal-Mart and you happen have the same need or you just want to do it to strike up a conversation, offer them a ride.
Be humorous. people LOVE to be around someone who is funny. It's the best thing to break the ice. That is why many speakers use jokes as a punch line for their speeches. Search online for numerous jokes. However, they must fit the occasions and be told at the right time in the right place. Also, rehearsing at home will help find the best way to deliver the joke.

Tips

When you see the person that you want to be friends with, smile and say "Hi". That's all it takes, and before you know it, you might start hanging out more often and the friendship will just take off.
Just be a good person.
Give compliments about stuff on their clothes, shoes, hair, etc. But be careful not to overdo it- flattery is a nice icebreaker, but shouldn't be used just to benefit yourself. The best compliments are true and honest, do not lie to people about their flaws. Just point out what you think is cool about them and don't sweat it if they disagree. Many people with curly hair hate it, many people with straight hair wish it was curly... don't let that kind of reaction throw you off. It's even better when it's about something they're doing - sketching, writing, running, whatever they just did well ought to get an honest cheer. Even if you don't like doing it, cheering on a friend who's accomplishing something will make your friend happy and they'll reciprocate when you do something that would bore them to try.
Find out what you have in common with the other person.
Make sure that you want to be their friend. You don't want to sometime later find them annoying and hurt them.
- This doesn't take 60 seconds, it takes more, but with patience you will get a long lasting friendship.
Watch what you say and be cheery.
A small tip, girls like guys that can cook! They also think it's adorable when you are sweet to younger children. That includes your siblings, their siblings, neighbors, cousins, etc.
Ignore snobby people who sit and pull faces at you for striking up conversations with others. Yes, some people will snicker and sneer about the conversation they heard you having but be proud you actually made the effort. They've just labeled themselves as obnoxious, not the kind of people who you'd want to hang around with if you want to be happy.
- It makes you look good and them a snob. That's bad for their reps, and will eventually cause them to back off.
Be yourself. Its no use basing a friendship on someone who you aren't.
Don't go to overboard and act too clingy to a person. This will just make them back off and go further off where they were in the beginning of your friendship!
Try not to annoy the person you are trying to make friends with.
You can also try showing them some cool talents you have.
Remember that everyone you know today have been strangers once.

Warnings

Don't lie, because that can complicate the situation.
It's good to make a small joke about yourself before teasing someone you've just met or it can start them thinking "this person doesn't respect me".
But don't be afraid to tease them a bit, as long as it is good natured. Don't be a jerk.
Don't act like someone else just to impress people. Most people can tell when you are doing this. It will actually get them annoyed and back off and act awkward around you.
You may not want to befriend some people. For example, if you make friends with someone who is easily offended, he/she may end up spreading rumors about you being mean.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Attract Friends

Being a friend can be a game of chance. You can make friends naturally in some cases, and it can be a constant work in progress in others. Using the "Do unto others..." model, you can always tilt the odds in your favor.

Steps

Be a friend. There is an old saying that holds true even through today's troubled times: "If you want a friend, be a friend."
Be yourself. Everyone is unique, so dress how you want to. Avoid the peer pressure, cookie-cutter personality profile. Don't try to fit in, be proud of your individuality. Then, go out and do things with people you meet, whether they be existing or new friends, and go and enjoy yourself. Be noticed for being yourself.
Be respectful, smile, and do something that will get you noticed. Help others out if they need it.
Be nice to others and to new friends you meet, to people you meet. If you are in school and are working with someone that is unpopular, be nice and listen to what they want to say.
Be modest. No one likes a show-off, especially if they do it all the time. If you want to brag about something, don't prolong it, and do it tastefully.
Be Outgoing. There's nothing wrong with being shy. But lighten up a little. It'll be hard to attract friends if you're anti-social. Talk to new people. Meet the new kid in school. Introduce yourself to the person who sits behind you in math class. More people will want to be around you.
Smile and watch your relationships grow. The qualities and character you build from doing the above will shine through, and people will love someone that will smile during the hardest of times. Try not to frown, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile!
Follow the basics of common courtesy. Learn to listen. Be a friend. Don't gossip. When you're given a confidence, keep it. Be responsible. Own your actions. Keep your values. They are the only things you truly ever have. When you lose them, you lose everything.
If people don't like you or don't accept you, just remember that no one is perfect. Not everyone will like you. A lot of people will act like they don't like you because they are afraid of what others will say. They are insecure. Deep down, they may not like you, but they respect you.

Tips

If you like a sport, join a team; there will be many people who like the same sport as you, so there's some common ground to build on.
It may sound strange, but wearing bright colours may help you to get noticed; as it says above: everyone is unique, so dress how you want to; don't try to fit in, and be proud of your individuality.
If you're looking for an un-popular friend, then DO NOT hang out with the popular group. Then they will just think you want to be popular. Instead, hang around the friend you are looking for.
Complimenting people is always helpful. People will warm up to you more if they think that you appreciate something about them. Everyone feels better after being complimented. Try to be honest, though. Nobody likes a suck up.
Always try to help the people around you.
Don't rush it, or else they may just think you are weird.

Warnings

Try not to mix multiple groups that are radically different; the atmosphere may be a bit tense and it may prove difficult to develop meaningful friendships.
On the other hand, sometimes it can be easier to make a deep friendship with someone who is outwardly quite different, but shares the same ethics and values as you. In these cases, the outward diversity simply makes life more interesting.
If you notice there is something you do, or some thing about you that makes others nervous, it is probably best to stop. Individuality is great and all, but there is no need to make a tense atmosphere.
Don't be a show-off.
Don't dominate the time or space of others.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Act Around Girls

Although interacting with girls seems like an intimidating endeavor to many guys, adhering to certain principles allows it to be a more comfortable and enjoyable experience for everyone involved.

Steps

Be yourself. It's important to maintain self confidence by being yourself around girls. If you adopt an alternate personality to attract girls, you will eventually be weighed down with the feeling that your true self isn't good enough. It may help to develop and improve your social skills, but any girls that don't appreciate you for who you are don't deserve your attention.Ads by
Relax. When you are tense or nervous, you will be more prone to feeling embarrassed if you make some minor mistakes. Staying calm allows you to fully enjoy a girl's company. Be careful not to place all your hopes on a single girl; it will only make it more painful if things don't work out as you would like. Don't let any prior sour experiences prevent you from seeking opportunities that are available to you.
Respect all girls equally. You stand a much better chance of making a good overall impression if you treat girls that don't interest you just as nicely as those that do. This doesn't mean that you need to talk to or flirt with every girl, but don't ignore them or treat them dismissively. Don't talk to a girl about other girls' attractiveness; it's distasteful and can degrade the girl's opinion of herself. You generally shouldn't talk about past relationships you've had, or other girls that interest you; it detracts from building a new relationship.
Exhibit good manners. Girls love guys who are polite and courteous. Refrain from doing or saying things that many people consider offensive, including swearing and making sexist/racist/etc. jokes or comments. Saying things that you know would probably offend some people isn't a good way to make or keep friends. If you act like a gentleman, demonstrating your respect for females and other people in general, girls will be more likely to welcome your company.
Be attentive. When you talk to a girl, give her your full attention. Make eye contact, and don't give in to distractions. Listen carefully to what she says, and you may learn a lot about her and discover interests that you have in common.
Be sensitive to her feelings. If she seems upset about something, don't try to downplay her emotions or dismiss her concerns as being trivial. Sincerely offering sympathy to someone in distress will build trust between you, and it is an effective way to form friendship or gain a girl's interest.
Make her laugh. Engaging in lighthearted banter will make it easier to talk about more serious things, allowing you and a girl to learn about each other without feeling as awkward about it. A good sense of humor is one of the most attractive qualities a guy can have, and it will help override any possible negative preconceptions a girl may have about you. Remember, however, that being funny isn't appropriate in every situation, and your style of humor won't necessarily impress every girl.
Recognize that physical contact should be limited by the state of your relationship.
- Acquaintances — A handshake when introducing yourself is probably a reasonable limit for a first meeting. You can also subtly brush your hand against her hand or arm.
- Casual Friends or Prospective Dates — You could try something like touching her hair or playfully poking her in the side and asking if she is ticklish. This is generally considered flirting, and if a girl doesn't appreciate your advances, it's best to apologize and refrain from making similar contact.
- Good Friends — It is generally acceptable to give friendly hugs to girls that you know fairly well, even if you aren't a couple. Just be sensitive to the girl's feelings about it; pressuring her to hug you will make her uncomfortable.
- Boyfriend/Girlfriend — When you've grown closer, ( take it slow ) you can hold her hand or wrap your arm around her shoulders or waist when you're walking together. With her consent, you can also kiss her.
- Note: Obtaining a girl's consent before hugging or kissing (or other contact) does not necessarily require a verbal confirmation. Pay attention to her body language to ensure that she isn't looking apprehensive or trying to pull away, and don't try to surprise her unless you already know she won't mind.If she's trying to pull away, let her go!!!
Make her feel special. After making a good first impression, if you hope to pursue a more earnest relationship with a particular girl, you should elevate your efforts to treat her well and express your romantic interest. Offer sincere compliments, flirt, and watch for an opportune moment to ask her out.

Tips

Don't panic if you do something embarrassing. A lot of girls find that really cute, especially if you are able to recover with good humor.
If you have a good relationship with a sister close to your age, that can be a model for how to move and speak around girls.
It's okay to tease her a little, but generally not about her appearance. If you're not sure she'll take your teasing the right way, try something else instead. Just watch your timing and try not to be too goofy, or you may make a fool of yourself.
Watch her body language; if she's shifting her weight a lot and not making eye contact, she's probably uncomfortable. It may be the conversation topic, how close you are standing or sitting next to her, or something else. Respect her feelings, and change the subject or step back, if necessary, depending on what is bothering her.
If no commitment has been established between you and a girl, don't get jealous of her flirting with other guys. She can't be considered disloyal if you haven't even started dating her yet. Also note that such flirting does not by itself indicate that you can't form an exclusive relationship with her at some point, but acting jealous can make it more difficult to cultivate that relationship.
Girls like it when you're forward but not in a creepy way. Smile at her in a way that's clear, friendly, and/or playful. If you feel compelled to honesty, you can offer a sincere compliment. For example, you could say she has beautiful eyes or a beautiful smile. But, only say things like that if you want it to be obvious that you intend on moving beyond flirting. Select something good that is reserved for her only; it will make her feel wonderfully special, admired, and beautiful.
Be the same around her and your friends. Get to know her friends and be friends with them. This will show her that you're nice and friendly.
Don't try too hard. She'll notice.
Be especially careful in breaking the touch barrier with shy girls. Shy girls are going to have very good guy friends they may even like, but suddenly going up to them and hugging them/demanding a hug may seem threatening to her. If you know she's shy, take it slow. Very slow.
Make the first move if you can, girls feel weird when they have to ask a guy out.
Girls like it when guys are nice to them. So don't try to be rude or do stupid things. All you have to do is to be yourself and act as a gentleman (for example, open a door for her or help her with something). Girls like guys who are polite. So just be sweet, funny, and friendly.
When she's cold, say, "Are you cold?" She'll say, "Yeah, a little." Then you say, "You wanna borrow my jacket?" Whatever the answer, she'll like the offering.
Don't send girls mixed signals or they'll get confused about whether you like them or not. Don't make it too obvious, but give her some hints so that she can figure out that you like her.

Warnings

Don't be too casual in sharing the details of your interactions with a girl. You should limit the disclosure to really close friends whom you can trust to not tell others. If you treat your relationship with a girl as a form of entertainment for your friends, you will undermine the potential for a deeper and lasting connection with her.
Don't focus too much on one girl if she isn't enjoying the extra attention. She may get annoyed, and it will likely hurt your relationship.
Many girls like it when you can't take your eyes off them, but not when you're staring at their boobs. Although there are some girls that may enjoy such attention, you won't offend anyone by focusing on her face instead. Do not oggle her. Just remember to use discretion and show proper respect.
There is nothing wrong with trying to make her feel special long into a relationship, but trying to kiss up to her, especially within the first few weeks of knowing her, will do more harm than good, and you will be labeled more as a friend who tries to buy her attention than a potential mate.
Having good manners is important. Don't pick your nose, scratch your butt, pick at your body in any way, fart, or burp, cough, or sneeze with your mouth wide open, etc. Gross her out, and you'll be lucky if she ever looks at you again.
- There are some girls out there that think burps and farts are hilarious, and would love you for them. Remember, don't generalize; learn about her personality.
Don't say perverted things or jokes. It grosses most girls out and they will not think well of you for it. You may be trying to be funny, but it is disgusting and a huge turn-off.
Be especially careful of what you say about her appearance. Don't ever tell her that she looks bad. Restrict use of words like "hot" or "sexy". Even if said in a joking fashion, things like this can make a girl feel very self-conscious, whether you are referring to her or to someone else.
If you feel "sexually aroused," hide it but not in too obvious of a manner. If it's too obvious you get aroused around them they will get creeped out.
Don't make mean comments about her friends or things that she likes, such as her taste in music; it might annoy her.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Treat a Woman

When dealing with members of the opposite sex it is important to understand that their thought processes are not the same. When a woman communicates a problem to someone, she is generally looking for empathy. When a man communicates a problem to someone, he is generally looking for an answer. These concepts are borrowed from the book "Men are from Mars women are from Venus." For men, this is a big departure from how thoughts are processed. Your best approach is to sincerely listen while resisting the urge to offer a solution. She doesn’t want to know how to fix a problem until she asks for a solution. There is one more very important perspective to consider and that is love languages. When expressing intimate matters of the heart, it is important to know that each person (man or woman) listens on different "frequencies". The book "Five love languages" describes how to send love to your honey efficiently and effectively without missing a drop. Deeds & affirmations are the love languages of my wife. Our relationship improved drastically by simply making coffee for her. In the past, I didn't make coffee for her, now I make it frequently. This wouldn't work for me but it works for her and that’s all that matters. When you send love in the direction of your honey it would be a real shame if she didn't receive it. You have to send it on the right frequency in a way that she can hear.

Steps

Be compassionate and understanding. Women like men who are compassionate and understanding and someone who genuinely cares. A woman wants to be able to say in her mind, "Oh what a good man." A woman wants a man to tell her often how important she is to him and as well as showing her that in his actions! Flowers, a gift, a card, for no reason, or even just a phone call or leaving a loving message on her voice mail while she is at work!!! All a little extra touch that tell her she matters. It's also important for a man to be confident in himself and have dignity. And to be both very loving and confident (not clingy and needy) is very attractive.
Give her thoughtful gifts -- women love surprises. Gifts don't always need to be expensive, but always from the heart. Gifts should never be about the "money". It's the thought involved and the reason behind it. It just shows you really care and she is the one you are thinking about.
Give flowers for no particular reason without waiting for a birthday or holiday. Even if you are away, you can order them online and have them delivered on the date you choose. Some of the best things are just a single flower she loves. Men sometimes think they have to be rich but its the thought guys. Remember to send stuff to her office on occasion as a nice surprise. It isn't enough to make her feel important it's also important for others around her to see she's treated well and spoiled.
When you are spending time with her, make sure she has your attention. Make sure you listen to her and talk to her. Just sitting beside her doesn't count as time together.
Understand that little things mean a lot! A love note, rose, sweet text message or things like this just to let her know you are thinking of her and care for her.
Never ever forget her birthday, Christmas, New Years, Valentines Day, Mother's Day--all her friends are getting little love gifts and acknowledgment and women compare how thoughtful their man was. If you want to be King then you better be on top of things. Anything is better than nothing.
Be polite and complimentary. Women like to hear "please", "I am sorry", "I promise" and "thank you." Also, ask her how her day is going. Tell her she is gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, and that she has lovely eyes. Just telling her she is wonderful often helps. Thank her for everything she does for you. In addition, recognize that there is more to her than the physical aspect. Compliment her efforts, like when she cooks or buys a nice meal.
Be a good listener. Have respect for her thoughts and opinions. Recognize her intelligence and strong points. Even if you don't agree with her, find good points from both perspective's. It's paramount to her knowing she is seen as a total person. Never cut her down, even if you are kidding. Find something unique about her that no one has ever told her about.
When you are in places where you can't be visibly affectionate, look at her and smile lovingly.' Be a gentleman, open the doors for her, hold out your hand or arm for her, some say this is "old fashioned", not the case. It is a sign of respect, and just common courtesy in public for both sexes. However, don't just do it in public, still common courtesy, at home also-put her first as she is a lady.
Be a good communicator. Listen to her, hear her out, and give eye contact to let her know you are giving full attention. Be interested in her. However, you also need to open up and tell her your thoughts, opinions, and problems, but wait until she is done telling you her thoughts. Do not interrupt. Help give ideas about possible solutions to problems, but praise her if she finds something other than what you suggest.
Brag about her to your friends and to hers. This is especially important as relationships grow. She'll like knowing she is appreciated and that his friends know he is in love with you.
Look the woman straight in the eye when giving compliments.
In general, it's best not to say another woman is beautiful or attractive to you (if the woman you are with is not the most beautiful woman to you then you are probably not in love). Be respectful towards your woman in how you treat other women. Even if they are your friends. Any favors, gifts, gestures, looks, over-friendliness or flirting can be very threatening. Always be mindful. Don't compliment another woman on something that your girlfriend is struggling with or knows she just doesn't have (i.e.: a skill or something to do with appearance) this will only make your girl feel embarrassed and worthless to you.
Smile and be polite.
Help around the house. If it needs to be done do it without expecting her to. Remember: Work is important, but the house work is both of your responsibility. Don't expect her to constantly pick up after you. One of the best ways to a woman's heart is to do house work!
Don't leave sexuality completely up to the woman if you're in a relationship together. If you feel like the time is right, gently let her know how you feel. And when a women says she wants to spend quality time with you, don't assume she is thinking about the bedroom! Usually, she means spending time together one on one, whether you are in your PJ's watching a movie, or just going for a drive.
Tell her she is beautiful. Not hot. "Pretty" and "hot" have their place, but "beautiful" goes right to the heart. Sometimes she'll look hot or sexy, so tell her. Don't tell her too often that she is cute, she is after all a woman and not a child. Pay attention and know what part of her ego needs reinforcing.
Compliment her on things other than her looks. What are her special qualities? Is she creative, fascinating, funny? Do you admire her achievements and her outlook on life? Tell her! But sometimes she wants to feel like she's arm candy to you.
If she gets annoyed or upset with something you did or did not do, apologize first. Explain later, if she asks for explanation. Speak gently and be sincere. Women are adept at reading sincerity. It's possible she will give up on the fight and forget about it.
Accept her interest in hobbies that don't involve you. Even if you'd be bored out of your mind, talk about her hobbies and interests with her. She does have a lot to share about it and wants to tell you all about it if you'll let her. Don't belittle it, because even if it's not something you're interested in, it means a lot her.
Avoid being jealous of male friends, co-workers, and exes without good reason, because she talks to them about you all the time. They know she's taken.
Talk to your friends, co-workers, and family about how lovely she is, too. It will make her feel good, even if you think she won't know you said it. It's always best, anyway. (Women just know things. They're very intuitive.) Plus talking about her in such a nice way makes you want to see her as soon as possible, and only good things can come from that.
Always make sure you cherish her because in most cases she is going to be there when no one else is. If anyone says negative things about her (even behind her back), "stand up" and show them you are her man, tell them to stop; don't listen. Be and act worthy of her trust in and feelings for you.
Remember, she's a woman, and her thoughts about what she wants can change day by day. Don't get mad at her for it. Love her for it, because, hey, she's a woman, and you like that about her.
Never forget, compliments go a long way. You can't be mister charming at the beginning of the relationship and then, once you're involved, just stop the charm! That's not right, and it makes her feel like she's done something wrong to make you not feel that way anymore. Either that, or she'll feel like she was stupid for not seeing you for who you really were in the first place. If you're going to be charming and romantic, you have to stay that way. No matter how "comfortable" you are. A woman will feel like you are not interested in her anymore. If you are still interested you have to show her because telling her is not enough. A woman needs the man she fell in love with. Don't become detached and take her for granted. Call her, text her, and email her often, buy her flowers, chocolate, write a love note, tell her how special she is and that you miss her.
Romance her (courtship), . Try to catch her attention and win her over. Even if you have her already, keep her! If you don't, other men will be there to give her the treatment she needs from you. Take charge, women like to feel swept away. If it is an anniversary of some sort, Men, listen up. Surprise her, especially if you don't surprise her with much. If you are with a highly respectable woman, money or gifts that cost too much are not the way to her heart. You will make a larger impression with a nice card and hand written words from your heart and a single rose, or small box of her favorite chocolates. And if you have a little money to put out, a simple necklace, or pretty earrings, can be found for little cash. It shows you put thought into your relationship and how much she means to you! Never ever ask a woman if you should get her something for an occasion. Women love gifts; as long as they are thoughtful, it won't matter if you spent anything on it. Make a card, do something corny in your own charming little way. They will remember it forever!
If you want to make her feel attractive to you, "Make Out". You can't skip steps! She loves and needs the steps it takes getting there. Even if you've gone that far before, this still applies. Kiss her, hold her, caress her, kiss her neck and look her in the eyes. Don't look bored, disinterested, or tired. She wants to feel special and sexy. If you don't think she is and don't really want to make out with her and hold her, you are not really in love and should move on.
So note, women are delicate, even the toughest of women long for romance. Think with your own mind and let your true affections show. Nothing speaks more than written words. If you are in a good relationship she will do the same in return. But be a man and step into your role! Women want to feel wanted and that you enjoy their company. Sneak up behind them and wrap your arms around them for an intimate hug. Kiss her neck. Show her you enjoy being close with her. Make it a goal to touch or hold her at least once a day. When you give, you can receive.
Hold her hand all the time -- Hold her hand when you are walking in the public, or mall. Hold her hand like she's your woman and like you're proud to have her beside you. Touch her hand across the table, put your arm around her when your sitting together watching T.V. or at the movies. These gestures will all make her feel protected, special and loved.
Don't go out of your way to get the last word just to win an argument. It will make you look uneducated and selfish. Gently explain yourself and then give her time to answer. Learn to let it go. If she doesn't want to talk about it, then don't; it's not the end of the world. If she wants to talk about it, then hear her out.
Do not use profanity or belittle or laugh at her thoughts and feelings as you will lose an argument automatically.
Don't make and break plans without a very good explanation and an apology. Make sure you call and not text to make such changes.
Be on time. Always call as soon as you know you may or will be late. Do not wait to call, even though you think she will be angry. Not calling before you are late can or will make her frustrated, then worried, AND then angry.
Always take care of your girl -- make sure all her needs are met. Besides a home, car, electric, water, food, clothing, appliances, medical, dental, vision and all those other needs, she needs to know most of all that you love her and only her. Surprise her today with a small gift she will cherish forever-give her your heart.
Always be respectful to her parents, they mean the world to her. If you don't respect the parents, you might as well say goodbye to her.
A woman (actually people in general) can be very temperamental at times. Respect her wishes when she needs space to breathe. Do your best to listen to her and provide tender loving care. Touch her, give her a long hug, make some tea, or give her chocolate; it can make all the difference.
If you love her and can't imagine your life without her then make the commitment. Ask yourself this question, "If she walked out the door tomorrow could you and would you want to live your life without her in it?" If the answer is no, then ask her to marry you and mean it. Show her you mean it by buying a ring and tell her that you don't want to spend the rest of your life without her by your side. Tell her why you love her, what she means to you, why she's special, and why you're asking her to marry you. Trust me, she won't want to be your girlfriend forever. Most women want the stability of marriage and a husband who can provide and protect her.
If the answer is yes, and you can see your life without her, then end it gently and honestly and move on. There is no point in dragging something out if you know she's not "the one".
Why not plan that special surprise another way? Speak to her friends, listen to them, and plan a surprise for your loved one that way.
Notice when she is crabby and ask her about it.

Tips

Tell her you love her. Don't wait for her to say it first.
Be honest with her, she will respect you more for it.
Don't make then break a promise.(Never tell a women the wedding is off because you're trying to make a point. Trust me not a good idea.)
Make her feel like she is the most beautiful woman in the world.
Don't belittle her or insult her.
Be supportive of her at all times.
Help with her projects, whether she helps with yours or not! But keep in mind you never want a selfish girlfriend, if you're doing everything you can to help her out, expect the same in return. She'll be happy to do whatever she can for you, too.
Make an effort with your appearance.
Acknowledge her appearance when she looks good. Tell her she looks beautiful.
Make her feel special at all times.
Take her on a romantic break and somewhere really special if you are in a relationship, or a special night out if just dating.
Buy her little gifts if you see something that she would like (don't wait for a special occasion).
Don't criticize (unless it is hurting you). Look for the good.
Don't skips steps on the romantic level. Some of the best times are those times leading up to sex.
Let her know how it makes you feel to have her as a girlfriend, and that there's no other person in the world you'd rather be with. (and if you have to lie to say this, you're not really in love.)
Tell her she's important to you, that she's special to you, and that she's beautiful on a regular basis.
Tell her that she is surely her dad's princess but for you she is the Queen
Try to engage her with tasks which are otherwise difficult for her, like involve her with repairing your old stereo, fixing and washing your car etc. This would give her the feeling of being your true friend.

Warnings

Treating a woman well is one thing. Sacrificing your self-respect and dignity is another. Maintain a sense of self and your own values. If you communicate your feelings about your own self-respect and dignity. Someone who respects himself can be all the more attractive.
Don't exaggerate on compliments and go out of your way to try to be with her all the time, or she will think you are a phony. Also don't neglect her too often or she may run into someone else who doesn't. A woman needs to feel wanted.
Men get hung up on the fact engagement rings cost so much, remember this -- its a symbol of your love, it is something she will wear for the rest of her life, it is the most important piece of jewelry she will ever receive and wear proudly, she will want to brag to her friends about it!! You do not have to spend $20,000 on a diamond ring -- but get the scoop from her friends, every woman dreams about her engagement ring and has talked about it with her friends!
Remember that all women are different. Never, ever say things like, "I bought you flowers. You're supposed to like that. You're a woman!" or "You better like what I bought you. I paid a lot of money for it."
Don't make promises and not keep them. You may end up losing her.
When she is upset, legitimately care.
Don't be obsessive over her or on top of her 24/7--women need their space.
Don’t compare her to other women, such as Rosie O'Donnell
Don’t verbally abuse her or her family members
Do not lie to her. You will lose her trust and she won't know what to believe.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Approach a Girl in Public

This is a good way to approach women in a public setting without seeming creepy. You can meet women anywhere. You may even meet your future wife standing at a bus stop.

Steps

You have to get out there and seek them out! Most intelligent and classy girls do not go door to door looking for dates.
Enter a public place such as school and check out the girls (Note: if you are too old to be in school, it will look creepy).
Seek eye contact. Maintain eye contact while trying to keep underwear and armpits dry.
Smile. Avoid appearing overconfident as she may find you cocky, but you mustn't be shy either. Some girls do like shy guys. But most of them want a guy who's not afraid to go out on a limb sometimes.
Approach with confidence; don't use cheesy pick-up lines (A pick-up line is a conversation opener with the intent of engaging an unfamiliar person for sex, romance, or dating. ...), they rarely work. A simple "Hi, how are you tonight?" should break the ice. Or, if you're a teenager, a less formal "Hey, how's it going?" or "Hey, what's up?" will suffice. Being polite and friendly always helps.
Wait for the signals that she is interested: laughing (at your hilarious jokes), flicking her hair around, etc. If she makes any physical contact, like touching your arm while she laughs, it's a good sign.
Take a hint if she's not interested. If she's busy, or if your comic genius is not being appreciated, then say, "It was great to meet you" and cut your losses. If you come on too strong, some women might feel threatened.
Take it small steps at a time. If you think she is interested: be brief, retur to your friends, say, "Maybe we can have a chat later."
And most important: Be yourself!

Video

Tips

Hygiene: Wash, brush your teeth, clean your ears, cut your nails, pluck those hairs out of your nose. Women notice every flaw so hide them well.

Dress well: ask your sister or mother for advice, wear nice shoes, smell nice but don't overdo the aftershave and smell.

Don't be cheap: pay for her drinks, dinner, her taxi ride home. If she insists on paying her own way, try, "I will get this one, you pay next time." However, if she seems truly intent on paying, don't push it! Let her, but insist you pay the next time. (Note the hint of there being a future between the two of you. Many women will pick up on this subtle comment, but not all; you may be able to ascertain if she's interested by her reaction to this.)

If a girl is on her own, don't point that fact out, and beware if they are in a group of friends as you will end up having to impress more than one girl.

For guys, remember that girls naturally have a wider range of vision than men. When a girl glances to her side she could be trying to get a view of you. Conversely, be careful if you're looking at a girl more than is normal and you can see the sides of her eyes: she can probably see you just as well as you can see her!

Warnings

Be yourself.
Be hygienic.
Approach her only when you are happy.If you are angry,there are chances that you might end up shouting at her.
Always have manners, open doors for her, chew food with your mouth shut, and be polite to staff.
Do not act perverted around her. It is extremely unlikely that she will think it is funny. (While there may be some girls who will be amused by this, there is always the possibility that she is only pretending to laugh to be polite.)
Don't rush to tell her that you love her, take things slowly.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Know if a Girl Likes You

Not sure what those glances, smiles and looks mean? Follow these steps to find out if she really likes you, they'll help.

Steps

Strike up a small conversation. This will help you learn little things that will come in handy in the future. If you like a girl, don't let her slip away, tell her the truth, but if you don't like her and she told you that she does, don't say anything...it can break her heart. And when she tells you that, and, you don't like her, tell her that she's a great person. Girls like it when boys say they like something that they did or either said you're great at something. All girls are different, so be aware of the signs. Listen to the tone of her voice: if she's shy, the tone of her voice might be a little more soft, and she might start to play with her hair (smoothing it down, twirling, flipping), adjusting her clothes, and might stare at you. Another sign she likes you is if she laughs at only your boring or stupid joke. (Though, don't use bad jokes as a test, or you'll risk looking like a comedy dork.) She may not be able to look you straight in the eye and she might giggle a lot because she is thinking of funny, nice gossip.

A girl that's interested in you will usually immediately smile when you start a conversation with her. The smile may disappear quickly if she's shy, but it's hard to hide an unexpected strong emotion. If she's not interested (that doesn't mean she doesn't like you, but she likely doesn't have a crush on you), she'll likely look at you inquisitively, but she won't express any particular strong emotion.

Watch for signs of flirting. If she's flirting, she may be difficult to read. Flirting girls may flirt with guys who they consider to be just friends, and it can be misconstrued as a crush. Although some girls have no idea they are flirting. Most girls do not want to be obvious, the flirting ones might flirt with you a little bit less or they might flirt with you even more. Either way, don't "flirt around". Do not flirt with other girls. If she ever sees you putting your arm around another girl or sees another girl hugging you, she may jump to conclusions and assume she doesn't mean anything to you. And she has nothing you like or she doesn't act the way you like girls.
Notice if she gives you random hugs. With this, you can go alone with it if you want, or just act busy like you're late for class or something.
Notice if she "accidentally" bumps into you more often than what people do (she's obviously trying to touch you or feel how strong or soft you are). If she finds excuses to do so, then you're probably on the right track. Tell her it was okay and you're fine. But conversely, don't assume that she doesn't like you because her fall didn't touch you. She may be too nervous of you to touch you yet. Break the touch barrier yourself. She may also find other reasons to touch you, such as by lightly hitting you about the head, or soft punching to the body.
Observe how she looks at you. If she likes you, she will either hold it for a long time or pull away immediately. Either of these could mean that she likes you. If she pulls away quickly, it means she is nervous but she still likes you. Some girls might just be staring so don't think she loves you and wants to kiss. But if she holds the stare, and you see love in her eyes, then she is confident and she may make the first move. If you happen to glance at the girl and you see her staring back at you, then this means that she likes you, although she may quickly dart her head in a different direction
Look at her friends. If you see most of her friends glancing back at you and smiling or giggling, this means that she is telling her friends about you. If her friends are loud and immature, you'll hear "(your name), (her name) likes you!" Her friends might be making it up, however, just to tease her. So you should probably listen to stuff like, "stop teasing me!" or "be quiet! He might hear!!" When she is having a conversation with her friends, and you come over, she might stop talking all of a sudden. This likely means you were the subject of the recently ended conversation. If she likes you and she told her friends about you, they might come up to you and start a random conversation about things such as: Who would you rather date me or (her name), who do you like better, who is the hottest, would you marry (her name) or me, etc. If they name a list of about 3 people and her name is in the list, she probably told her friends about you and they're trying to search for clues to see how you feel about her.
Look out for the damsels in distress. If you're outside and the girl you like in nearby and starts loudly saying "I'm cold!", that's a subtle hint that she wants you to give her your sweater. This is a very sweet gesture, especially if you want to show the girl that you like her. If there are other guys and she likes one of those guys, however, she might act disappointed when you offer yours to her first, look for her mad and tell her that who ever she likes gave it to him to give it to her. In which case at least you'll know how she feels and can move on. Sometimes a girl will pretend to be really bad at something, and say that they can't do it. That is your chance to offer some assistance, and she will most likely be doing this on purpose just to see your reaction.
Smile at her. Do a natural smile - don't freak her out. If she smiles politely for frowns and looks away, she is obviously freaked out by you. If she returns a soft or big smile and continues to look at you, then she is interested. If she smiles then darts over to the crowd of her friends and hides in the group then she may be nervous and curious if you know that she likes you.
Watch her body language. You can gather a lot about a girl by her body language and there are a lot of signs that will tell you she's interested. For example, if a girl has her torso towards you in an open manner this means she is confident talking with you. If she has a 'closed' body position (ie. legs crossed, arms in front of torso) she may be she or nervous to talk to you. Watch for subtle signs in the girls face, if her eyes are dilating then she may really like you. If her lip quivers slightly when you look at her you can almost be sure she likes you.
Notice little things she does for you. If she's always there for you when you need help, even like when you mention that you're really thirsty and she quickly offers you a sip from her drink, she might like you. But don't assume that she's into you only from one experience. Ask her occasionally for small things, like chewing gum or a pen, and notice how she reacts. If she's always ready to offer you something you might need, go further and ask her to help you with something else, like a school/work problem. It shouldn't be something really easy to solve, but not too difficult either, as some girls who aren't too smart might say that they don't know how to help you with those kind of things. If she's eager to help you, she probably likes you.

Video

Tips

If she constantly asks about your status with girls and asks your preference in types of girls, then she is likely fishing to see if she might meet your interests.
If you find out that a girl likes you, don't act like she is from another planet or has the flu. Girls don't like it and their hearts can be very fragile, so be careful. Don't be mean or give her the cold shoulder because IF you do end up liking her eventually, she may not give you another chance. Also, that kind of mistake can mess up your reputation as being a good boyfriend.
A lot of shy girls usually won't admit that they like you unless they know that you like them too, so if she denies it to someone not close to her, don't lose hope! If you like a girl, ask to become friends. If she is interested, then obviously there is something there. If she objects to a friendship, don't take it personally, as there are plenty of other girls out there.
Do something nice like cleaning something up for her or doing her a favor. Then see how she reacts. If she eventually tries to do something nice to you back, this might be a hint that she likes you.
If she asks you to go out and do something with her only or with another couple, this may indicate that she is trying to send you the message that she wants to be more than friends.
Always be yourself. If a girl likes you for someone who wears expensive clothes, and you don't, then just don't date her.
While there are certain body language signs that have commonly been associated with a girl "liking" a guy, do not get too excited just because she exhibits some. Body language is not completely universal, some girls express their feelings through different actions than others. Take your time, find out if she's actually interested by talking to her. A girl that's not interested will likely try and make excuses to end the conversation and get away from you.
If she is very shy then she probably won’t be able to talk to you face to face. She will talk to you online instead, but even for some girls, this takes courage. If she talks to you online but shies away when she sees you then odds are she likes you a lot.
If she brings you gifts from her trips or for your birthday she probably likes you, and when she points out how hard she tried to find something you might like, she might be giving you a hint. This only applies when you're not best friends.

Warnings

Girls might try the "jealous approach" and start flirting with your friends to make you notice them more. Be wary of these girls. If you really like her, pay more attention to her and try to get her alone - she might get the hint that you like her and stop trying so hard. And as much as you may want to...don't EVER do the same thing back. Girls are more sensitive and will probably just give up on you if you do that.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Come Up with Good Conversation Topics

How to Come Up with Good Conversation Topics

You can instantly become good friends with someone just by having a great conversation with them. Here are some conversation ideas in case you get stuck:

Steps

Offer a genuine compliment like "I like how you look in those she is" or "You did a fantastic job with that presentation today" or "I love the way you play the piano". Try to make it a compliment that involves something they did, rather than something they are, because then you can carry the conversation forward by asking them how they did what they did. "How did you learn to put together such great presentations?" or "Who taught you to play the piano?" If you tell someone they have beautiful eyes, they can thank you and the conversation ends there.
Bring up family. Your safest bet here is siblings. Parents can be a touchy subject for people who had troubled upbringings, have estranged parents, or whose parents have recently passed away. The topic of children can be uncomfortable for couples who are having fertility issues or disagreements about whether to have children, or for a person who wants to have kids but hasn't found the right person or situation. So stick with asking about siblings:
- Do you have any siblings? How many?
- What are their names?
- How old are they?
- What do your siblings do? (Modify the question based on how old they are. Do they go to school/college, have a job? etc.)
- Do you look alike?
- Do you all have similar personalities?
- You could mention a 2008 study which found that the oldest sibling usually has the highest IQ, but younger siblings tend to excel in other areas of life, like sports and arts.[1] If you have siblings, you can say something like "I know that's true/not true for my family when I was growing up, is it true for yours?"
Ask about their travels. Ask the person where they've been; even if they have never left their home town, you can always ask where they want to go.
- If you had a chance to move to any other country, which one would it be and why?
- Of all the cities in the world you've visited, which one was your favorite?
- Where did you go on your last vacation, and how did you like it?
- What was the best/worst vacation or trip you've ever been on?
Inquire about food and drink. Food is a little better to talk about because there's always the chance of bumping into someone who has had issues with alcohol abuse, whether they were alcoholics, or they had negative experiences with an alcoholic. So talk about food. Be careful that the conversation doesn't stray into someone going on and on about their diet, how they're trying to lose weight, etc. That can take the conversation in a negative direction.
- Ask "If you could only have one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?"
- Where do you like to go when you eat out?
- Do you like to cook?
- What's your favorite kind of candy?
- What's the worst restaurant experience you've ever had?
Ask about work. This one is especially tricky. Use with care. A date might think you're a gold digger. Or the conversation could end up sounding like a job interview. Still, if you can handle it carefully and keep it short and sweet (and prevent it from turning into a competition over whose job or boss is worse) then here are some starters:
- What was your first job ever?
- Who was your favorite boss in the past and why?
- When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
- What do you like best about your job?
- If money was no object, but you still had to work, what would be your dream job?
Find out about their interests and hobbies. This is where it starts to get more personal. It's up to you to carry the conversation beyond these questions in an appropriate way. Just always remember to stay positive, ask questions, and relate.
- What do you do in your spare time?
- What kind of music do you listen to?
- What kinds of movies do you like to watch?
- What are your favorite TV shows?
- What's your favorite board game or card game?
Video

http://embed.5min.com/55167366

Tips

Read up on current events. Read the paper and browse social bookmarking sites for current, interesting stories. Be careful with religion and politics though. With some people, this can quickly go awry. Try to stick with something more general.
Listen carefully, and try to relate. After someone has answered, relate your own experience to something they mentioned, or answer the question yourself, even if they don't ask you.
A really good way to keep the conversation going and balanced is to take it in turns to ask questions. It doesn't need to be like a quiz, or a competition to see who can ask the best questions, but it's a gentle way of maintaining a good conversation. Better still, you can introduce some basic rules, such as: The questions can be about anything you like, and if the person doesn't want to answer a question, they don't have to. By saying that, things aren't so awkward if you accidentally ask a sensitive or inappropriate question.
If it's your first time talking to the person, try to tie the topic to something related to the situation at hand, rather than just jumping into some random topic.

Warnings

Play it safe and don't talk about any of the following unless you are really good friends with that person:
Past relationships
Anything that can be answered with one word
Politics
The next date or future dates.
Religion
Illness, bad health
Unpleasant smells
Job woes (boredom, bad boss, pays, etc.)
Specialized interests, unless the other person is fascinated and wants to know about it. Watch this if you have Asperger syndrome.
Dark topics like serial killers and stalkers
Bragging
Any negative judgments
Don't just mindlessly work through the list of questions mentioned above. It will certainly make the other person feel interrogated.

'Wayne · 13 Oct 2011

How to Come Up with Funny Conversation Topics

There are a lot of ways to come up with funny conversation topics. Here are some tried and true tactics to keep your talking partner laughing.

Steps

Look back at yourself. Think about what has happened to you recently that might be perceived as being funny. Something that is sure to get a laugh from the person you are talking to.
You might find something bad that happened to you that you can laugh about now, and share it with others. We all have our bad moments that we look back and laugh about. Well, why not share it with others? It not only shares a piece of you with them, but also gives them something to laugh about in the process.
Buy a book of jokes, or a book that discusses ways of making people laugh. Jokes can be used in many ways, and what is so neat about them is that they come in a variety of topics for everyday use.
- There are also many funny joke sites on the internet that you can browse for free, and grab your material from.
Try out some scenarios. The way to start a conversation with a joke is very simple. You can start with many different ways, but the most popular is “I heard this joke the other day, and I ***************ed up when I heard it. Mind if I share it with you?” See, that is not so hard, is it? You not only started to communicate with them, but you also gave them the choice on whether or not to hear the joke.
- If they do not want to hear it, that’s fine. Carry on with normal conversation afterward.
Utilize your surroundings. Find something about the situation you're in that you might find funny, or can figure out a funny story about. Maybe you had a funny experience with a certain brand of clothing, or shoes, or know someone who did.
See things on the light side. When something happens that doesn't feel great, try to find the silver lining. Some people are very good at doing this and making light of the more difficult situations in life.

Warnings

Most of the jokes in books are overused, make no sense, or are otherwise lame.

3dlife · 14 Oct 2011

Interesting post, but if one suffers from social anxiety, a huge protocol for social interaction is even more stressful, dont you think?

cerbatana · 16 Oct 2011

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

How to Meet Girls On Facebook Consistently

I’ve been wanting to get down to the essentials of what it takes to meet women on Facebook.

I’ve spent the last year really hitting the social networking sites hard using a trial and error approach. There are many ways that work, but this method works the most consistent. I get the majority of my dates this way now because it’s easy and time efficient.

How To Meet Girls On Facebook: The Friend Building Phase

Before you can start PIMPING your Facebook account, you should understand a few things first. You should realize that this technique takes advantage of your current friends and acquaintances. I’ve actually found this scouting technique works really well with friends OF friends that you’ve met once or twice. I dip into the best friends pool sometimes, but using this technique exclusively on your friends limits its potential and scalability.

You need to go out an actively build your friends on Facebook. Everyone you meet in a decent passing conversation you say, “You gotta be on Facebook right?” “Ok then, whats your last name, I’ll add ya!” Then you add them. This is just like building rapport with women. You want to build on commonalities, so they remember you when you add them and you can use that social equity when you get them to set you up. People will accept 99% of the time. You want to do this with women, especially an ugly or not your type of woman, but not men (straight men). Men are protective over women in their network, even if they don’t know them well. Chances are that the guy is trying to seduce her anyway, so why would he want you as competition? The only guys of seen this work on are the really uber-social, that are friends with EVERYONE and never hook up. =)

How To Meet Girls on Facebook: The Rapport Building Phase

Once you’ve added these people, try and remain decent friends. About a week after adding them as friends, comment on a photo, post on their wall, saying stuff like, “What did you do in Thailand?” or “Nice beach. You guys must of RIPPED those waves up!” Just don’t come across as creepy or annoying. Just play it relaxed and sociable.

How To Meet Girls on Facebook: The Searching Phase

Now you’ve built some sort of rapport with your friends. Make sure you keep it relaxed and friendly. People love this. Next, this could take some time. Go through your friends Photos, usually not Photo Albums. Go through Photos were they are tagged. This usually means they are in a social environment and you have a better chance of finding women quicker. You need to do a little investigative work, but you should determine quickly if the women that you see with her are married/single/in a relationship. Once you have determined that…

How To Meet Girls on Facebook: The Messaging & Connecting

This step is crucial, but fairly simple. Message (don’t write on their wall) your friend this, “[Friends Name], you gotta set me up with that [NAME] girl! Tell her you’ve got a cool friend to set her up with”. They would say, “Yeah, I can. Come around and meet her.” This is fine, but if you want her phone number quicker. “Just get her to check out my profile and ask her if she doesn’t mind you giving me her number to call her!” This is a softening request that I’ve never had not work. Sometimes your friend would say, “Oh, shes taken.” or “Oh, every guy asks about her.” Then say, “Thats fine, you gotta set me up with someone though. Your friends are cute”. She will say, “Have a look at some photos and let me know” or typically, “What about my friend [NAME]?” You can be honest, say, “Oh yeah. Nice. Get me her number.” or, “I’m more of a [QUALITY (hair color, personality type)] type of guy.”

IMPORTANT: If you already have this friends number, you don’t have to message them on Facebook. You can just text them.
Once you have her number. I usually text first. Say, “This is [NAME], [FRIEND]‘s friend. Is it true what they say about [QUALITY]?
Then flirt away before meeting up.

How To Meet Girls on Facebook: Conclusion

That’s how to meet women on Facebook.
This is one of the best ways to meet women, because you already have a level of social proof, and you can see what women look like so it’s better than a blind date with minimal effort. I also don’t think it’s needy or supplicating by asking to be setup with women. If anything, it shows how masculine you truly are because of the mindset of the “prize”. Women already know men want women, by ignoring that fact you make yourself look feminine. The trick is to follow this with power and focus. Women should be with you and by setting you up with her friend, she’s doing her friend a favor.

Tips for live chat on facebook!
Ok facebook chatting is a lot like text game. You're comforatable with that. You don't have to reply right away on chat, in fact I don't on purpose, you don't want to seem like you have nothing to do but talk to her!

I don't chat online on Facebook, and you shouldn't either. It's essentially texting with a limited time to respond. If you choose to though, never initiate the message. If she doesn't message you first, then text her instead. Make sure your messages are shorter than hers, and try to get her talking without you asking questions).

The Art of the Profile Picture
Nothing on facebook is more important to attracting girls than the profile picture. I've experimented with several profile pictures and here is what I've come up with:

1.) Pictures involving "showing off" are not effective.

This includes the generic mirror picture or any shirtless picture where you are non-verbally saying, "Hey, look at my awesome body." It doesn't matter how chiseled your abs are or how large your biceps are, the insecurities of your cry for attention will always outweigh the benefits of actually having an attractive body. By putting up this type of picture you are trying to impress others and in turn raise your social value. However, the opposite effect actually takes place. Alpha males do not need to show off anything. They are independent and content with who they are. They are not trying to impress anyone, rather they are the ones who are being impressed by others. Girls sub-consciously notice this. To determine which pictures fall under this category, ask yourself if the sole purpose of the picture is to show off or impress another individual.

2.) Do not smile. Do not look at the camera.

When you smile into the camera, you are engaging your audience. Your attention is focused on the audience and this may not necessarily be the best way to grab a girl's attention. By not looking directly at the camera, you reverse the effect and act like someone who does not need to engage others. You appear more mysterious and stand out from the crowd. The objective of this picture is to Get Girls thinking, "Why is his attention not focused on me? What is it about this guy that makes him so special that he does not need to engage others?" By doing this, you appear more interesting and display another quality of alpha males.

3.) Do not pose too hard. Act natural.

You are not derek zoolander, and therefore should not be doing an impression of blue steel in your picture. Nothing looks sillier than an ugly guy who thinks he's a model. It is best to appear relaxed and act natural. Effective pictures often involve you doing something in a comfortable environment. For example, if you enjoy fishing then a picture of you fishing would be a good choice.

4.) I don't like group pictures.

For some reason I am not a fan of group pictures. It makes the person seem less independent and it shifts the focus from the individual to the group. Remember, the goal is to get the girl interested in you and to do this you must appear unique from the crowd.

5.) Baby pictures work to some extent.

Girls love this sh1t. They think it's cute and it gives you a sense of innocence. However, be careful not to cross the line. You don't want to appear like you are living in the past or trying to hide your current unattractive state.

6.) Do not put up a million profile pictures.

Girls do this, not guys. We should not appear like we are overly concerned with our appearance.

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

Learn How to Meet Girls on Facebook and Get Them Interested in You in No Time at All

Are you a guy that has trouble meeting girls? If you answered yes to that question you are certainly not alone. If you are tired of the club scene (or to broke to go enjoy it) but not really into dating sites, then rest assured that there is a better way to meet girls. In fact, you can learn how to meet girls on Facebook by using just a few simple techniques that will be sure to grab the attention of the girls that you want to get to know.

The use of social networking sites has exploded in the past few years. Not only are they free, but there are a ton of single women on them that are ready to meet guys and have a good time. Using social networking sites is one of the smartest ways to meet girls. Once you learn how to meet girls on Facebook you will not need to go out clubbing to meet girls (that being said, if you can afford it you can still go out clubbing to have fun).

Meeting girls online is a great way to break the ice, especially if you are shy. Once you learn how to optimize your profile and learn what to post and when, you can find out how easy it is to meet high quality single girls online. You see, it's all about the image that you project and using certain types of messages to intrigue girls and/or make them laugh. Learning how to meet girls on Facebook and getting them interested in you so that you know when the best time to move the conversations off of the internet and into text messaging or meeting face to face is a skill that any guy can learn, even if you still live in your parent's basement.

Using Facebook to pick up girls does require a certain amount of attention to detail. Learning when and how to reply to the message that you receive can spark a girl's interest. Knowing how to meet girls on Facebook is a great tool to have, especially if you are new in town or don't want the hassles of rejection issues or the awkward conversations that often occur on the first date. Using the internet to capture someone's interest and get to know them a little before you even set eyes on them is a no-risk situation.

How to Meet Girls on Facebook

Did you ever think about trying to pick up girls on Facebook? Although it's a bit harder to pick up girls on Facebook than it is on Myspace, learn how you can effectively attract girls that you don't know on Facebook!

Difficulty:EasyInstructions

- 1. Facebook has more privacy filters than other social networks including Myspace. Some girls even block their profile so that you cannot see it unless you're a friend. The only option that leaves you is to "poke," since that's the only way you can communicate to a girl that you are interested in.
- 2. But, let's go back a step. Before "poking" that sexy girl, you must have an awesome profile. Quality plays a huge role, since she'll be looking at your photos. Make sure that you have the best looking photos of your LIFE! Have a picture of you at the beach, at a party, one traveling, etc. Each quality picture on Facebook should express a unique characteristic and personality about you.
- 3. Next, you MUST have at least one picture of you on Facebook with an attractive girl, or if you can, MANY attractive girls. Why? This will be like a "social proof" and it will tell the girl that you are not a loser who has never talked to a girl before. If you are not the best looking dude, make sure to have some quality pictures and take some effect and care into them.
- 4. Once you have tweaked up your pictures and profile, you can finally "poke" her on Facebook. The key after that is to make a quick joke something along the lines of, "Hey, nice poking skills!" Or, you can ask her about a question regarding some aspects from her profile information. If she has a common interest as you, you can talk about that. The hope is that the two of you will have a back to forth conversation where it can lead to a potential date.
- 5. Number is a key factor when trying to pick up girls on Facebook. Simply, you would want to "poke" as many girls on Facebook as you can and see which ones "poke" you back with a response. Good luck!

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

How to start a conversation

The first step is to act quickly

When you see a girl that interests you, act quickly. Go right up to her and start a conversation. Never stall. Stalling will cause you to either psych yourself out or cause you to miss an opportunity (she’ll leave before you work up the courage to approach her). Worse yet, a lot of guys stall and never find the courage to talk to the girl. If you find yourself in this situation it’s time to be a man and walk right up to the girl and start talking. Trust me, you can do it!

How to start a conversation with a girl like this

Observe her and the surroundings
As you walk up to the girl start observing her (what’s she’s wearing, holding, doing and how she looks). Also, observe the immediate surroundings (are you in a book store, coffee shop, park). The more you observe, the more subjects you have to talk about. The more you have to talk about, the greater the chance she will like you. So pay close attention to your surroundings and hers.

Note: Never, ever use pickup lines! Girls don’t find them clever and they make you look desperate. In a conversation, girls look for authenticity – for something real. Pickup lines come off as anything but real.

Talking props
You know what a stage prop is right? It’s an object (furniture, books, plants, etc.) that help the audience know exactly where the scene takes place. The actors interact with these props. Talking props are objects that help you interact with the girls you meet. For instance, that book she’s holding is a talking prop – tell her it looks interesting and ask her what it’s about. Talking props are also objects you posses. An example is your dog, a great prop. If you’re out walking your dog in a park, especially if it’s a puppy, many girls stop to look at it – an excellent conversation starter!

Always ask open-ended questions
This is the key to keeping a conversation flowing. Nothing kills a conversation fast than asking a yes or no question. Here are some examples of bad yes or no questions: Did you like the new Harry Potter movie? Is that a good book? Do you like dogs? These question can all be answered with a simple yes or no which causes the conversation to not flow naturally.

Here are some examples of better questions: What did you like about the new Harry Potter movie? That book looks interesting; why are you reading it? What’s your favorite thing about dogs?
See the difference? Those questions cause the girl to give a more thoughtful response, which leads to more talking, than simple yes or no questions.

Sample Conversation Starters

At The Coffee Shop
If you’re standing in line at a coffee shop and a pretty girl is behind you, observe your surroundings. You might notice the unique mugs they have for sale. That’s an excellent prop to start a conversation. Turn to the girl and say something like, “Gee, that’s a really neat mug. What do you think about it?” Bam! Instant conversation!

At The Book Store
Suppose there’s a pretty girls standing next to computer book section (yes, it does happen!). You notice she’s holding a book on image editing techniques. Go up to her and say, “I hear that’s a good book. What are you looking to edit?”
At The Library
You see a girl studying an American literary history book. Say to her, “Hey I’m thinking about taking that class. My friend said it’s good but tough. What’s your opinion?”

At The Grocery Store
You see a girl buying a frozen meal that you like. Walk by her and say, “I love those! I make sure to fix steamed carrots whenever I eat them. What dish do you like to fix with it?”

At The Clothing Store
Suppose you see an interesting girl while your shopping. Pick up two different color shirts and ask her which color shirt she thinks looks best on you and why. You can also use the old, “I’m looking for a gift for my female friend’s birthday but I don’t know jack about women’s clothes. Do you think you can help me pick something out?” If she works at the store, she’ll almost always say yes.

At The Park
Let’s say you see a girl about to hike or done hiking one of the trails. Go up to her and say, “You know, I like this trail. It’s very pretty this time of year. What’s your favorite time of year to hike this trail?”

Note: Again, never use pickup lines!

Do you have questions, comments, success stories, or your own suggestions? Please share them by commenting below!

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

How to Keep the Conversation Flowing with a Girl (for Guys)

Steps

Something from your own life. For example, if she's talking about a trip she took to Paris, you can respond by telling her how you might like to travel one day. And if that doesn't work laugh at something she laughs at to make it look like you like some of the same humor as her.
Don't make her feel sports/films/tv programs; then work conversation and activities around this. For example, if you are both interested in "Friends" or "Family Guy" then you already have something to make conversation on. Or if she says she likes going to the arcade, you have somewhere to go and make conversation at etc.
Try to end the conversation by mentioning a way to keep the relationship going. Plan another time to talk, exchange phone numbers and/or email addresses, or a place to meet on another day.

Tips

Other things that lead to awkward pauses: announcing them ("I feel an awkward pause coming on"), dismissing what she just said (when she finishes a long spiel, don't just say something like "okay..."), shifty eyes after she finishes speaking
Feel whatever you say and be proud of however you are. On an approach when you are thinking nervous thoughts this is especially good advice for men.
Be charming/witty.
Flirt with her.
Do talk in a softer voice than usual (it will make her feel like you're giving her special attention!)
Don't be too cocky/egoistical - but a little bit is good, as long as you're being funny with it.
Don't be someone you're not!
Relax and make sure you take in deep breaths.
Make sure you don't stare at her breasts. IMPORTANT!
Ask her about what she likes and talk about it.
Be yourself. Sounds stupid but it's not. You don't want her thinking you're someone else for the rest of your lives.
If you get nervous don't show it. It's okay to be nervous it just means you like her.
Give her a hug/kiss on the cheek at the end! (Girls LOVE kisses on the cheek!) However, do this only if you know her pretty well, otherwise it might get pretty awkward

Warnings

If your friends come by, don't ditch the conversation. Say you'll talk to them later; you're in the middle of something.
Leave gracefully. If you have to leave first, say something like: "It was great talking to you, you're really fun to be around. I'm sorry I have to go, but talk to you later!"
If she has to leave, it would be great if you could walk her to where she's going. Say things like: "Great talking to you, we should do this again sometime." but don't do this more than once or twice. More than that will just turn the girl off.
Stay off your cell phone during converstion
Don’t talk about sex unless she brings it up. This may make her think you only want to have sex with her.
Don't talk about her to her friends (examples: ask if she likes you, is attracted to you, and so on.), because her friends will tell her and it's a big turn off because it shows you have no confidence.
Remember don't look at her breasts!

Things You'll Need

A place where you won't be disturbed
Some money (just in case for those special situations).
Gum or Breathe Mints for good breath.

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

Have you ever wondered why some men find it easy to talk to women and some don’t?
Hi, I am Chris Tannoy and I’d like to teach you secrets about approaching women and starting conversation. If you ever wanted to attract and date a woman the first step was coming up with great conversation starters with women.
Just read on and I will TEACH You:

Phrases for opening conversations with girls, start with small talk. After a few minutes of that, introduce yourself and ask her for her name.

... a simple hello followed by an introduction would be appropriate for introduction.

If you already know her name, just try to keep the talk small. Ask about movies, books, plants, kids, whatever you might know that she has....

When they are confortable talking with you... you become acquaintances, and then friends, and then lovers.

Start with hi, strike up a conversation about the place you're at or something easy, but use manners, girls don't like rude or too forward guys. That's how you get to know a person?

What's a good ways to start conversations with women in the public, once I've got talking for a bit?

"Start Hypnotic Conversations With Women "

LIKE um like "hi, i'm a bit embarrassed to say this but you're one of the most beautiful women i've ever seen, and i would really regret it, if i went home tonight without at least talking to you."

OR

make an opener that would flatter her a lot BUT DONT say you have a nice chest or something,
thats.... awkward and derogatory.

Another way is to talk about something in common like "that's one of my favorite drinks, do you get that one often?"
OR

"Hi, what do you think about the weather today?" Then start with small talk. After a few minutes of that, introduce yourself and ask her for her name. See how it goes from there.

Single Man Tips to Dating Girls
Start Conversations On Purpose

Before you speak you need to remember to be yourself, and not pretend to be someone else.
Then you should probably start with:
1) How was your day? - That might show her, that you intersted in her.
2) How are you feeling today?
3) What is the time now? - pretending to know, what the time is, while you looking at her with slight blush.
4) "Hi, my name is..." and you know the rest, right?
That's how you get to know a person.

Be yourself! It is funny how many times I have heard that advise told to people. But it is true. The best thing to do is relax. Say hello, hay, hi or whatever you would normally say to someone.

You can pretend to be nicer than you are, but then if the person takes that pretend person, they will not be apt to also pick you. Of course it doesn't hurt to be on your best behavior.

Flattering & Cheesy Pickup Lines Are They Any GOOD
Nope... Pick Up Lines are Misnamed

Most pick up lines are crappy, and some are insulting. Instead of going for pickup lines, try developing an ice breaker that fits your personality.

Practice on women you are not the least bit interested in. Old women, fat and skinny women, married women and single women.
Practice being nice to them and treating everyone, including the beautiful ones just alike.
"That is a very attractive dress your wearing"...
"I love the way you fix your hair."...
"That's a nice pin" i.e.

Learn to compliment woman about something you like about that person: "You have a lovely smile"...
"You have the whitest teeth"...
"Your shoes are very attractive" ...
"My you have a unique Name."

Then when you see that knock out blond with the finest...( what ever) you are confortable complimenting her on something other that one of her unmentionable body parts.
That is what the other guys are saying and not getting anywhere with.

I will tell you that a great sense of humor is always a plus. Don't try to hard. Watch from a distance for awhile and see if you can figure out a little bit about her.
I want what you want...someone to think we are kinda cool! Find out what she likes. If you like these things too, then you can chit-chat all you want. If not, don't force it, you have nothing in common, move on.

What Is The Correct Way To Start A Conversation With Women?

Make sure that you make eye contact. If that is too uncomfortable for you at first, then just look at her shoulder. She will never know the difference.

Give her a compliment or tell her it is really nice to meet her. Ask her how her day is going? Most people just want to be listened to,you won't have to do much of the talking at all.

Talk about music you like, something funny that happened, things that you like and be sure and ask her what kind of music she likes etc. What takes to approaching women and starting conversations.

When talking be aware of where your hands are. Keep them behind your back or to your side and bend in towards her just a little....not a lot.

This makes the person feel as if you are really listening. When she is talking all you need to do is nod, laugh, or agree. Keep it short. Tell her that it was nice to meet her and that you look forward to talking to her again.

Some Ways To Start Conversations With Woman You Don't Know?

Its not that difficult as long as you dont come off creepy.

Always pay attention to your surroundings and when an opportunity comes up to comment on something (probably besides the weather), do it in a funny way and involve the girl..

If you notice something you have in common or at least are in a very similar situation or just location, use that to your advantage. Make her laugh..

But most of all, and i cant stress this enough, just be yourself and be confident.. Women can sense it and really theres nothing more attractive than confidence..

Practice it but dont psych yourself out if you fail a few times.. And once you get more comfortable dont even worry about "sealing the deal". Just walk away after youve had a good convo..
You dont always need to try and make a move.

If you're trying to pick up women in bars/clubs/parties. Those women are prepared to be hit on by every man that sees them and they will have their defenses up.

You can always give her compliments! Find out what she likes to do, what are her hobbies! Try to find a connection that you two can talk about even deeper! You'll be amazed at how easy it is once you start talking!
Start Conversations On Purpose With Women
Be Confident When You Make Your Statements Or Ask Questions

Think about something which would be of interest to women, and test the water.

The best conversationalist are the ones that talk about the other person's interest in a convincing manner.
"You know, I don't know much about ...... but it is obvious that you do, can you help educate me about..."
Or I saw you dancing, (whatever) I wish I could ..... as well as you do, Where did you take your leasons."

The more you and ask the "right" types of questions, the more the other person will talk to you. Try not to pry into private areas until you know them better.

Ask open ended questions that they can not answer with a yes or no... and if they do answer a few questions with a yes or no, turn the answer to your advantage with something like:
"Really, I didn't know that you could ....?"
Tell me more about ....s.

Save the unmentionable body part compliments for when you become better acquainted. Then you can tell her she has a fine... or lovely...

Good Conversation Starters With Women

Be confident when you make your statements or ask your questions.

Look her in the eyes and smile to let her know that you're approachable and interested. If it doesn't work the first time, keep trying. Practice will do us shy people plenty of good.

Criticize or compliment something you can both see in a joking manner. This let's them know immediately that despite being shy, you can voice your opinion and you have a sense of humor, which is intriguing to any woman.

If you're in a class, find something about the teacher you can joke about. At a grocery store, point out a weird item. There are plenty of opportunities at a bookstore or library.

Make sure it's something that you really believe in - whether she laughs or agrees/disagrees, you can change the subject and ask her questions and get involved with her. (get her number, ask her out to coffee/lunch)...

It's a lot easier if you feel a warm reception to your talking to her to begin with than merely having intruded on her personal space. There is no one correct way to go about this, it all depends on a number of factors, and you have to be comfortable with yourself in those surroundings in general before you walk up to anyone and start speaking.

The only thing you're really doing, is inviting her into your space, finding out what she's about, and figuring out if you want to move forward, or not. I can't tell you how many times I had thought about or considered talking to someone, and, having observed how they interact with those around them, went elsewhere.

The next time you find yourself in that situation, eventually something will cross your mind and you'll know what to say to her.If it's meant to be, however, you will be able to quickly respond to how she responds to you and you've made a new friend. If it isn't you can leave where you entered and nothing is lost.

How To Start A Conversation With A Woman You Meet In A Bar Or Night Club?

Everyone is different. The best thing to do is to be yourself and just make a comment on something in the bar or about the crowd. You just need to be gracious about it, women don't like to be berated with silly remarks or silly pick up lines.
"Hi! Enjoying your time? May I offer you a drink?"
"Hello" is a good start and then while making eye contact, you should be able to determine if there is a possibility of a conversation.

DO NOT USE A FAKE LINE. Women who have any brains hate that. Just come over, say hello, and say you found her attractive.

Does she mind if you sit next to her? If she says you can, then you are in. Be a gentleman and don't try pulling the sexual stuff too early. If she's of any quality, she won't go for it.

Walk straight up in a non threatening way and say....Hi my name is............, how are you?
That is when you ask them out and leave with them or without them. "So can I get in your schedule" if she asks when then say whenever is good for you.

Try not to make it sound like a line. Give a compliment on her clothes, especially an accessory--or comment about the huge line to get to the bar. Offer to help her out by ordering her drinks. No need to actually BUY the drinks unless you're really interested.

If she doesn't want you to sit with her, just say, "Thanks. Can't blame me for taking a chance." And leave.

"You'll get all this, if you order in the next 24 hours..."

I've made it really simple to get started dating women today with all these great tips:

What topics are great to start a conversation?
How to talk about the other person's interest in a convincing manner?
How to ask open ended questions that she can not answer with a Yes or No...
And if they do answer a few questions with a yes or no, turn the answer to your advantage...
Think about something which would be of interest to her, and test the water...
What message did her body language convey before either or you said anything to each other?

The more you ask the "right" types of questions, the more the other person will talk to you. Simply read the instructions and follow the simple process to find all the gold you will ever need!

How To Start A Conversation With Women?

If you are a "nice guy" who never seems to be able to attract women, this could possibly be the single most revealing dating guide you ever read.

I have taken everything that I have learned, used what works, gotten rid of what doesn't, and I have added my own little 'touch' and my very own earth shattering secrets to picking up, attracting, and seducing beautiful women.

I have personally tested every single method and technique I teach you in it myself, all with GREAT results!

'Wayne · 17 Oct 2011

How To Start A Conversation With A Girl

It's not as difficult as it looks

Talking to a girl is simple and easy and there’s nothing to it, right? Wrong.
If you’re reading this article, then you know it’s not as simple as that. It is difficult to know what to talk about with a girl. Talking to a girl you like is intimidating and tough, something that a lot of guys fret over. I know personally that I’ve gotten nervous enough talking to girls that I KNEW wanted me, I simply ignored them and left the party or bar. These are girls that I KNEW liked me, and I was STILL scared.

The thing I figured out, though, was that the hardest part about talking to a girl is knowing what to say to start a conversation. Once that got firmly in the rearview mirror, the rest of the conversation flowed simply and with ease. Here then are a few tricks I’ve learned:

- Begin the conversation immediately. Instead of talking about stupid stuff like the weather or sports or whatever, stuff you would casually talk about with everyone from the mailman to your dog walker, find an actual topic of conversation. Now, this can really be anything (and I recommend talking about something you’re passionate about, or she is) but just stay about from the clichéd, boring conversation topics.
- Get flirty like crazy right away. This is also important. By touching her on the arm when talking to her, or smiling, or making good eye contact, or by talking about sexual topics, this makes her place you far away from the “friend zone” area. Immediately, she sees you as someone she will have to think about in sexual terms. For more advice on flirting, check out this video I made:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyrH_qa-uGk&feature=player_embedded"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyrH_qa-uGk&feature=player_embedded[/ame]

- Use an opener. If worse comes to worse, and you can’t think of any conversation to have with this girl, check out some of the PUA openers that I rundown in order to give you the best chance at opening correctly with a girl.

After you get through the opening and start actually talking to her, it should come easy, but if it doesn’t remember these three things:
1. Express your opinions. Girls do not like pushovers, plus it will give you something passionately to talk about.
2. Don’t overdo it on the compliments. You don’t want to come off as someone who is immediately into her. Plus, compliments on how she looks always sounds ridiculous. Instead, if you have to compliment her, make it about her sense of humor or style or something like that.
3. Tease her. This is that flirting thing again. Make sure to tease her about certain things and it will make the conversation that much sexual and full of tension.

To start a conversation with a girl, pickup lines are not encouraged. Girls do not find pickup lines very clever, and they will want something more original from you. Therefore to start a conversation with a girl, it will be best for you to approach her in a more natural and real manner.
Let me share with you 4 simple tips that you need to do in order to start a conversation with a girl:

1. Be observant. Be alert and observe her and the surroundings. For example, pay attention on what she wears and hold, and study the surroundings of the place. This will give you more ideas on what to talk about later on when you approach her.

2. Pick up your courage and just do it. Do not stall and consider, as this will usually cause you to either miss the opportunity or psych yourself out. Therefore the key here is to act fast, just pick up your courage and go. Do not be afraid of rejection.

3. Do not ask her a "Yes" or "No question. By doing this, you are only forcing her to give you a one word reply, which eventually kills off the conversation before you can talk further. Instead of asking her questions like "Do you love sports", ask her something like "You look very sporty, what makes you like doing sports so much". Do you see the difference here?

4. Have a confident mindset. By thinking negatively even before you start a conversation with a girl, you are basically killing your chances off. Think positively, and trust yourself more.

To start a conversation with a girl is as hard as you imagine. As long as you are doing the right things, you will be able to make the conversation flows smoothly.

I know it can really be a daunting task to start a conversation with a girl, especially when you don’t know her. However, there are some guidelines that if you follow, you’ll know exactly how to start a conversation with a girl even if you’ve never done it before. Once you have the conversation going, you’ll have to keep it up as she’s likely not going to have much to say until she warms up to you. If anything, you should expect to do most of the talking within the first few minutes of the conversation until it progresses to a point where you’re both talking equally.
So let’s start!

In seduction, you can either have a completely natural approach where you simply go up to a girl and say “hello”, or you can have a more mechanical approach where everything is broken down into tiny little steps. It’s likely that if you’re reading this you aren’t part of the more natural ones so let’s break a conversation down into tiny little parts.
The Opener

The first thing you say to a woman is called an opener. The opener’s purpose is to simply break the ice and get the conversation going. The key to a good opener is to engage the other person and if you can captivate their attention, then that’s even better. If your opener isn’t creating curiosity, then it’s likely that the girl you’re talking to will simply walk away or act very disinterested earlier on. If this is happening, then make sure to change your approach until you can at least get 30 seconds of conversation going each time you try to talk to a new girl.
As if it wasn’t subtly hinted enough in the previous paragraph, you should prepare your opener in advance. Ideally, it should be less than 10 seconds long, draw curiosity to you and be original! If you want mine, then that’s fine, it’s not very good but it works: “Hey there, how’s it going? I’m doing <enter activity here>, what are you up to?” (I told you it wasn’t very good! But usually I’m doing something interesting enough to be casual yet inciting)

Keep the Conversation Flowing

If after you say hello to a girl, you immediately have nothing to say, it’s likely that your efforts won’t go very far. All the courage that it took to go up to the girl… they will all be for nothing if you don’t have a follow up to your opener. What you say AFTER you’ve said hello is called a routine. These are stories, questions or even a game you play after you’ve first made contact.

Routines can range from asking specific questions, to telling stories about yourself or even doing a magic trick. However, if you’re using any type of prop to pick up women, then you better have a good explanation for it. Don’t just walk up to a girl, say hi and then read her palm. There needs to be something in between!

Instead, routines should be interesting and relevant stories that make people want to hear the rest. For example, if you start talking about how you just came back from the airport and the girl right beside you was stopped for trying to bring in a foreign animal onto the plane, you’ll be on your way to creating curiosity. Whatever you say, make sure it’s genuine and relevant to you.

Once again, make sure you prepare this beforehand so when the situation arises, you know exactly what to say. That way, if your mind draws a blank, you’ll have something to immediately say after introducing yourself. Some guys prefer to have many routines and then they stack them one after another. That provides them with hours of chatter without even having to think!
Qualifying the Girl

Now during your chat, if you simply tell stories, you’ll never get to know her! So this next step, where you ask her specific questions will get her talking as well. Your questions should be open ended questions about things that you care about. If you’re looking for a fun adventurous girl, ask her what the last adventurous thing she did was. Make her describe, in detail if possible, what kind of person she is and why she’s worth talking to. If you can reverse the roles like that, then you’ll be on your way to not only having an enjoyable conversation, but building attraction while you’re at it.
Recap

How to Start a Conversation and then keep it going in a few steps:

Create a personalized opener
Create two routines
Figure out what you want in a girl and think of two open ended questions

Once you’ve done all of this, you’ll have your own step by step guide to starting great conversations. Then all you need to do is go out and apply it.

Social Skills: How to Behave Yourself

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